Day after day and week after week, I watched in silence as you lashed out all your anger on me, pouring your feelings of hatred my way, bombarding me with sentiments of revulsion and disgust…
I watched in silence as you portrayed to the world how much I betrayed you, depicting to everyone how untrustworthy, backstabbing and conniving I am, adding your own flavor to stir the sequence of events a little…
I watched in silence as you supplicated to Allah against me, wished me death, desiring for me to break and hoping for my misery…
Day after day, I watched in silence… Convincing myself that it’s only a phase, in a few weeks it’ll pass, perhaps in a few months… but I kept the glimmer of hope in my heart, igniting it every day, despite your destructive attempts…
Day after day, I prayed to Allah to light both of our paths… and to give us the strength to overcome our ordeal… Knowing in my heart that you’re a river of forgiveness, an ocean of compassion, and will heal in just some time…
I prayed for our hearts to mend, for yours I prayed even more, knowing what I had done had hurt you so deeply.
When I thought the timing was right, I spilled out my feelings to you, trusting you will listen, trusting you will give me a sip from that river of forgiveness that I thought was your heart…
There I stood, facing you, admitting my mistake and certain you will listen, and actually really listen… but my words were in vain…
“I’m sorry I hurt you, it wasn’t my intention, people make mistakes, it wasn’t my intention.”
I can’t remember how many times I uttered these words to you, reserving that glimmer of hope in my heart, despite your continuous attempts to overshadow it, I still kept the hope…
I uttered and I uttered, I spoke and I spoke… but my speech was ever so useless, you are not the person I have known all of these years.
Word after word, I watched you dismiss me, dismiss my every thought, my every regret…
Apology after apology, you stood there with a heart even tougher than stone, rejecting every word that came out of my mouth…
Standing there in front of you, pouring my endless feelings for you… You stand there in front of me, and you are somebody else…
Who are you?
Certainly not someone I know or recognize, hardly any person I would refer to once as a friend… A best friend?
What did he do to you?
Did he drink from your river of forgiveness until he ran it dry?
Him or me?
You chose him over me, do you realize what you've done?
Does he even love you?
You say that he does, yet people in love don’t strip their lovers from happiness… they don’t take away their loved ones, their families, their friends…
Will you ever wake up?
I pray that you do, I know he had a hand in changing the you I used to know, and turning you into a new you that I don’t even recognize….
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